30 years or so ago, my Gram made me a Raggedy Anne costume for Halloween. I'm not sure how I came to have the costume in my possession, but I've had it for many years and had hoped that one day I would have a little girl who could wear it, too.
On Monday for Kennedy's Halloween party at school, she wore my old costume. It made me think of my Gram and miss her presence in my life. She was always one of my biggest fans and I never questioned her unconditional love. She always made me feel special and I love that she was such a big part of my life. Her death was a defining time for me and an event that left me with such sadness that I didn't quite know what to do. I had never experienced a loss, certainly nothing could compare. It took years for the hurt to lessen to a dull ache and where I once never let a day pass without thinking of my Gram, now days or weeks can zoom by without a memory. It's sad really, but also a blessing, because sometimes those memories can hurt. I felt tears sting my eyes when I dressed Kennedy in my old costume. I know my Grandma would have loved my kids, seen some of my feisty-ness in my daughter and smiled. Thankfully I know she is looking down on us and smiling still.
Here I am, circa 1981 or '82.
And here was Kennedy, October 31st, 2011
A simple outfit filling my day with memories of my dear Gram.